“A Room Is Not A House”

A letter written to the only true love in my life. Maryanne.

By Johan Bos

A room is not a house,

and a house is not a home when there's no one there.

Now and then, outloud I call your name,

and in my mind I see your face. But you're not there.

I reach out to touch you, and the hope becomes a flood of tears.

I look around my room and see a chair,

and through my tears I see you sitting there.

And again, I realize we're apart.

Then reality returns me to my broken heart.

My mistakes took us apart. Mistakes that hurt your soul.

I didn't know who you were. Your understanding I didn't see.

And now I'm lost without your tenderness and devotion that always covered me.

My purpose is no longer. Its meaningless goals I've abandoned.

I see now with my heart your value, character that was always present.

My memory has been reawakened to your delightful personality,

the personality so apparent when we met. I remember that day,

the sky opened and the ground shook.

The years and the world has changed us. Yet I still hold on to a dream.

A dream that seems to slip each day further from reach.

But hope remains. Its all I have in this lonely room.

My love for you has increased like I never knew possible.

A different love, one I didn't know was available.

Now that I've learned, through pain, real love, I ask,

please God, let it be that she's still in love with me.

Life is now vanishing.

For if a room is not a house,

then there is no hope for a home.